I don’t need to be anything other than a prison guard’s son
I don’t need to be anything other than a specialist’s son
I don’t have to be anyone other than the birth of two souls in one
Part of where I’m going is knowing where I’m coming from
(Chorus)
I don’t want to be anything other than what I’ve been trying to be lately
All I have to do is think of me and I have peace of mind
I’m tired of looking ‘round rooms wondering what I gotta do
Or who I’m supposed to be
I don’t want to be anything other than me
Friday, September 30, 2005
I make a vow
My life will always honour you
Whether I live or die
I belong to Him
He bore my sin
I owe this life to my saving King
Hallelujah, I am not my own
You are in control
Hallelujah
For me to live is christ
And to die is gain
No matter what price i pay
I choose to give this life away
Only by the cross I am saved
How great are those lyrics?? Just awesome, I thank God, the real big daddy of love! ;)You're love is something I could never achieve, and I can only try to repay some of it and to show the love You gave me to others in my life.
My life will always honour you
Whether I live or die
I belong to Him
He bore my sin
I owe this life to my saving King
Hallelujah, I am not my own
You are in control
Hallelujah
For me to live is christ
And to die is gain
No matter what price i pay
I choose to give this life away
Only by the cross I am saved
How great are those lyrics?? Just awesome, I thank God, the real big daddy of love! ;)You're love is something I could never achieve, and I can only try to repay some of it and to show the love You gave me to others in my life.
| Your Ideal Relationship is Serious Dating |
You're not ready to go walking down the aisle. But you may be ready in a couple of years. You prefer to date one on one, with a commitment. And while chemistry is important, so is compatibility. |
| Your World View |
You are a fairly broadminded romantic and reasonably content. You value kindness and try to live by your ideals. You have strong need for security, which may be either emotional or material. You respect truth and are flexible. You like people, and they can readily make friends with you. You are not very adventurous, but this does not bother you. |
| Your Brain's Pattern |
Your mind is a creative hotbed of artistic talent. You're always making pictures in your mind, especially when you're bored. You are easily inspired to think colorful, interesting thoughts. And although it may be hard to express these thoughts, it won't always be. |
Your Seduction Style: Au Natural |
You rank up there with your seduction skills, though you might not know it. That's because you're a natural at seduction. You don't realize your power! The root of your natural seduction power: your innocence and optimism. You're the type of person who happily plays around and creates a unique little world. Little do you know that your personal paradise is so appealing that it sucks people in. You find joy in everything - so is it any surprise that people find joy in you? You bring back the inner child in everyone you meet with your sincere and spontaneous ways. Your childlike (but not childish) behavior also inspires others to care for you. As a result, those who you befriend and date tend to be incredibly loyal to you. |
Agree? Disagree? Think you're at the wrong blog?? Feel free to leave comments!! :)
Yes I know I took the easy way out and just put up test results again, but hey just like good animes (like Naruto) you need fillers between the good parts to catch your breath!
But being the hopeless romantic fogey I am, i've been examining what love means to me. Love is something that should grow naturally and out of getting to know each other and the building up of trust and respect for each other and helping each other grow that will amount to a connection. It is the idea that out there in this huge world and how screwed/unique we are, there is ONE person that you were just meant to be with. You may say I have a high expectation of love, well, I do, but yet I think that by having this high expectation, it will end up being everything and MORE. You may call me naive, but once I meet that other person who believes in love as much as I do, we'll see who's smiling on the other side. :)
I want to be in love all of my life and beyond that with the person I do choose to fall in love with. I don't want to love because I need love, but because that person is worth loving. But what I'd value in a relationship most is commitment, because when you have a relationship between two really committed people, I think almost anything is surmountable. Life can seem so lonely and you may feel that you never know what's going to happen sometimes, but it'd be nice to know that someone will stick by you no matter what and go on that journey of life with you. Here's hoping I find that someone someday! :)
Men have died for love, God sent His son to die out of love, yep, love is truly something.
"Once you've found that lover,
You're homeward bound,
Love is all around,
Love is all around"
~Better Man by Robbie Williams
Thursday, September 29, 2005
Hey I thought i'd pop in by and just let everyone know what's going on in my mind these days. It's not great reading nor is it ever going to be made into a movie, but it's my life and hopefully some of you are interested!
Well it's the 29th of September, and in about a months time it will be exams!! Grar shock horror the bane of my life! Well I'm even more stressed than I normally am because this year I did the 'smartest' (sarcasm) thing of my life to take 4 law papers instead of the usual prescribed 2. My intentions were to catch up with the rest of my friends who made it before me so I could be in their classes in future, I don't know whether that was the best move or not, but I've chosen my path and I have to walk it to the end.
These exams basically encompass everything we've learnt throughout the whole year. And being in law, that can cover everything from psychopathic criminals to things that you're supposed to snort up your nose to prevent influenza (Carlill v Carbolic Smoke Ball Company [1893] 1 QB 256). And I'm feeling the pressure.
I've been less slack this year than I was last year, but at the same time I'm still behind. My natural intelligence has reached its limits and I find myself having to work to succeed, which is a lesson i should've learnt a long time ago. It's not like Economics which comes easily to me, or Accounting which consists of problems which you can solve once you know the formula. Law requires a broad base of knowledge and although some of it is common sense, you still need to spend the time to find references from past cases (called precedent) to back it up. Not to mention the hours you spend reading cases and understanding the concepts that have been written up by wise men who probably smell like cheese (sadly I might end up like one of them). So I think I really have to study, and study hard.
I have to fight this laziness inside of me, which seems to have overtly overtaken me and I've only come to realise how inactive I can be sometimes. Oh I'm always doing something, but it's always something that I enjoy, and not something that I need to do. If everyone was like me, then human race would be extinct in...... oh about 3 days because no one would work. I need to change that side of me and I have been trying to. Laziness seems like an attitude that people like to adopt because everyone else says it and so 'if everyone's doing it, it must be ok' but I need to change that kind of thinking in myself. Some people also say doing what you enjoy is no wrong and if you don't enjoy reading cases then you shouldn't be doing law, but I say that a balance needs to be struck. If that were so, people wouldn't go to see their kids recitals and watch tele at home, some things just need to be done, and for me right now, that's study.
So thus, I find myself destroying the social life that I built up throughout the year. And my wipe begins again, I go back to Malaysia, and when I come back next year I have to start my friendships almost from scratch again. But that's been my defining characteristic and how I've gotten to know so many cool people out there in the world. I adapt, and I'll survive. But it would be nice to come back knowing that someone will be waiting for you, oh well... one day..
But in all these complexities of the world (that's only scratched the surface), I think it's good that we acknowledge that life isn't always about smiles and having everything sorted out. I'm not the happy-go-lucky guy you think I am huh? :) Well, I am, because in all these things I know that God is in control and He knows everything and He can do anything, and guess what? He loves me! And to everyone who I've just exposed my weaknesses to, I hope you respect me more instead of criticising my weakness, because face it, we all aren't perfect, and I'm still a work in progress, and I know you guys are too and I love you all for it. I guess the most important thing is that we always remain an ACTIVE work in progress and accept each other for what we are. :)
Life isn't always easy
Complexities surround me
Sometimes it's not clear to see
Evidence of your majesty
But I am hanging on
To the one
Who gives me life
But I am hanging on
To the one
Who gives me life
Wow, that's one long and complicated blog. It's probably been the most truthful blog I've written in a long time, in a world where even our true selves aren't allowed to be all that true. I'm making a resolution to study hardout till exams, then maybe I can head out into the sunlight and smell the roses again :)
Blog ya later~
~I want to know you,
Yet I don't, because I'm afraid what I know won't be true,
I want you to know me,
Yet I don't, because I'm scared you won't like what you see,
But yet, if we would just accept ourselves and each other
We can build each other up
Then maybe we could really be who we were meant to be.
Well it's the 29th of September, and in about a months time it will be exams!! Grar shock horror the bane of my life! Well I'm even more stressed than I normally am because this year I did the 'smartest' (sarcasm) thing of my life to take 4 law papers instead of the usual prescribed 2. My intentions were to catch up with the rest of my friends who made it before me so I could be in their classes in future, I don't know whether that was the best move or not, but I've chosen my path and I have to walk it to the end.
These exams basically encompass everything we've learnt throughout the whole year. And being in law, that can cover everything from psychopathic criminals to things that you're supposed to snort up your nose to prevent influenza (Carlill v Carbolic Smoke Ball Company [1893] 1 QB 256). And I'm feeling the pressure.
I've been less slack this year than I was last year, but at the same time I'm still behind. My natural intelligence has reached its limits and I find myself having to work to succeed, which is a lesson i should've learnt a long time ago. It's not like Economics which comes easily to me, or Accounting which consists of problems which you can solve once you know the formula. Law requires a broad base of knowledge and although some of it is common sense, you still need to spend the time to find references from past cases (called precedent) to back it up. Not to mention the hours you spend reading cases and understanding the concepts that have been written up by wise men who probably smell like cheese (sadly I might end up like one of them). So I think I really have to study, and study hard.
I have to fight this laziness inside of me, which seems to have overtly overtaken me and I've only come to realise how inactive I can be sometimes. Oh I'm always doing something, but it's always something that I enjoy, and not something that I need to do. If everyone was like me, then human race would be extinct in...... oh about 3 days because no one would work. I need to change that side of me and I have been trying to. Laziness seems like an attitude that people like to adopt because everyone else says it and so 'if everyone's doing it, it must be ok' but I need to change that kind of thinking in myself. Some people also say doing what you enjoy is no wrong and if you don't enjoy reading cases then you shouldn't be doing law, but I say that a balance needs to be struck. If that were so, people wouldn't go to see their kids recitals and watch tele at home, some things just need to be done, and for me right now, that's study.
So thus, I find myself destroying the social life that I built up throughout the year. And my wipe begins again, I go back to Malaysia, and when I come back next year I have to start my friendships almost from scratch again. But that's been my defining characteristic and how I've gotten to know so many cool people out there in the world. I adapt, and I'll survive. But it would be nice to come back knowing that someone will be waiting for you, oh well... one day..
But in all these complexities of the world (that's only scratched the surface), I think it's good that we acknowledge that life isn't always about smiles and having everything sorted out. I'm not the happy-go-lucky guy you think I am huh? :) Well, I am, because in all these things I know that God is in control and He knows everything and He can do anything, and guess what? He loves me! And to everyone who I've just exposed my weaknesses to, I hope you respect me more instead of criticising my weakness, because face it, we all aren't perfect, and I'm still a work in progress, and I know you guys are too and I love you all for it. I guess the most important thing is that we always remain an ACTIVE work in progress and accept each other for what we are. :)
Life isn't always easy
Complexities surround me
Sometimes it's not clear to see
Evidence of your majesty
But I am hanging on
To the one
Who gives me life
But I am hanging on
To the one
Who gives me life
Wow, that's one long and complicated blog. It's probably been the most truthful blog I've written in a long time, in a world where even our true selves aren't allowed to be all that true. I'm making a resolution to study hardout till exams, then maybe I can head out into the sunlight and smell the roses again :)
Blog ya later~
~I want to know you,
Yet I don't, because I'm afraid what I know won't be true,
I want you to know me,
Yet I don't, because I'm scared you won't like what you see,
But yet, if we would just accept ourselves and each other
We can build each other up
Then maybe we could really be who we were meant to be.
Monday, September 26, 2005
If only you'd see under the rust you'd see that there's gold,
If only you'd see through the sea you'd see the fish,
If only you'd read past the cover you'd find the full story
And if only you'd see through my face you'd find the real me.
But you only look and you compare,
And although there's plenty much nicer,
But no one as true or as heartfelt as me,
Who cares for you truly and deeply and wants you to be
The best person you could ever possibly be
But you might never find out because you only looked
And don't yet see....
I dunno what you call that, but it's what I feel. I guess it reminds us that everything is like an ogre... or an onion.. because they have layers. And nothing is ever as simple as it looks. Just like God can peel through the layers and get straight to the heart of the issue to give us what we NEED, not want; we need to try to peel through some of those layers.
In 1 Samuel 16:7 it says "The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart"
We are by no means God, but I believe that God understands how to truly judge a man's actions, after all, HE MADE US, and we should try our best to follow in His example by looking past the flesh into the heart, by pulling apart the strongholds in our lives, by peeling away at those layers. Then maybe we could discover what God really has in store for us.
~I thank you for being in my life, even if only for a brief moment, because every smile and laugh we had made my day. Who knows, one day I hope you'll see the gold beneath the rust :)
If only you'd see through the sea you'd see the fish,
If only you'd read past the cover you'd find the full story
And if only you'd see through my face you'd find the real me.
But you only look and you compare,
And although there's plenty much nicer,
But no one as true or as heartfelt as me,
Who cares for you truly and deeply and wants you to be
The best person you could ever possibly be
But you might never find out because you only looked
And don't yet see....
I dunno what you call that, but it's what I feel. I guess it reminds us that everything is like an ogre... or an onion.. because they have layers. And nothing is ever as simple as it looks. Just like God can peel through the layers and get straight to the heart of the issue to give us what we NEED, not want; we need to try to peel through some of those layers.
In 1 Samuel 16:7 it says "The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart"
We are by no means God, but I believe that God understands how to truly judge a man's actions, after all, HE MADE US, and we should try our best to follow in His example by looking past the flesh into the heart, by pulling apart the strongholds in our lives, by peeling away at those layers. Then maybe we could discover what God really has in store for us.
~I thank you for being in my life, even if only for a brief moment, because every smile and laugh we had made my day. Who knows, one day I hope you'll see the gold beneath the rust :)
Tuesday, September 13, 2005
Just a little song I wrote when my ex gf broke up with me, I was feeling really low, but I knew that God would bring me through it, that even though I was feeling like no one listened to my cries, God always does and He offers the encouragement and love to get through anything. So be comforted :)
While I Sleep
How could this be? Am I still here?
Someone touch me please, I cannot feel
This pain I can't bear anymore
A broken heart inside my core
But i can't lose hope
I'm not that weak
I try but who listens to my cries while I sleep
I thought I was the man I'd be
But nothing changed inside of me
The games we played were all in vain
I can't see out, no I see no gain
But I won't lose hope
I'm not that weak
I try but who listens to my cries while I sleep
Someday I know I will be no more
But I can't lose hope
no not this way
For every flower that dies
Will be replaced by a seed sometime
For every heart that's broke in two
There'll be another I promise you
So don't lose hope
You're not that weak
You cry, and I'll listen to your cries while you sleep.
While I Sleep
How could this be? Am I still here?
Someone touch me please, I cannot feel
This pain I can't bear anymore
A broken heart inside my core
But i can't lose hope
I'm not that weak
I try but who listens to my cries while I sleep
I thought I was the man I'd be
But nothing changed inside of me
The games we played were all in vain
I can't see out, no I see no gain
But I won't lose hope
I'm not that weak
I try but who listens to my cries while I sleep
Someday I know I will be no more
But I can't lose hope
no not this way
For every flower that dies
Will be replaced by a seed sometime
For every heart that's broke in two
There'll be another I promise you
So don't lose hope
You're not that weak
You cry, and I'll listen to your cries while you sleep.
Hello! Just came in to check up on the ol' blog, make sure it didn't evolve into something with legs and 3 eyes while i was away, but here it sits, like an ever faithful companion. Sniff, reminds me of my dog CJ before we had to eat *cough* uhh I mean give him away.
But anyways, HIYA!!! Allow me to welcome you to my blog if i haven't already done so, and to thank you for coming to read up on the vida loca that is my life.
It's the first day back from holidays, and I'm already exhausted. University is a challenge but some of the compulsory subjects are such a bore I just blank out sometimes. Had a pretty harsh day to start out with, 4 hours of lectures and one tutorial to sit through. But the good thing is there is only 6 weeks left of uni to go...... until exams that is.. sigh :P
But the holidays were jam packed of fun again, as always. I do feel a little guilty because I hardly had anytime for God, but I will have to do something about that next time I guess.
Things I got up to during the holidays : snowboarding on Turoa, saving Keith from himself (actually he got hurt falling on some rocks while snowboarding), did the KAC dance for the KAC ball (a whole lotta fun), spent time with my bro and his gf coz they were up in NZ for a while (great times), went fishing in the bay of islands, went to a couple friend's 21sts, went ice skating, saved Yen from himself (he fell while iceskating, sigh I seem to attract injury), had many numerous nights of DOTA, went to Waiwera Thermal pools, and ate an enormous amount of food. Yep, all in two weeks, it's been hectic i tell u!
Something that deserves special mention are the oysters in the Bay of Islands, they were the size of my hand!! I have never eaten ones that large before and I probably never will again (until I go to Bay of Islands again of course *grin*)
But yeah that's it, I will update more with much deeper thoughts soon (I hope), till then, blog ya later!
But yeah,
But anyways, HIYA!!! Allow me to welcome you to my blog if i haven't already done so, and to thank you for coming to read up on the vida loca that is my life.
It's the first day back from holidays, and I'm already exhausted. University is a challenge but some of the compulsory subjects are such a bore I just blank out sometimes. Had a pretty harsh day to start out with, 4 hours of lectures and one tutorial to sit through. But the good thing is there is only 6 weeks left of uni to go...... until exams that is.. sigh :P
But the holidays were jam packed of fun again, as always. I do feel a little guilty because I hardly had anytime for God, but I will have to do something about that next time I guess.
Things I got up to during the holidays : snowboarding on Turoa, saving Keith from himself (actually he got hurt falling on some rocks while snowboarding), did the KAC dance for the KAC ball (a whole lotta fun), spent time with my bro and his gf coz they were up in NZ for a while (great times), went fishing in the bay of islands, went to a couple friend's 21sts, went ice skating, saved Yen from himself (he fell while iceskating, sigh I seem to attract injury), had many numerous nights of DOTA, went to Waiwera Thermal pools, and ate an enormous amount of food. Yep, all in two weeks, it's been hectic i tell u!
Something that deserves special mention are the oysters in the Bay of Islands, they were the size of my hand!! I have never eaten ones that large before and I probably never will again (until I go to Bay of Islands again of course *grin*)
But yeah that's it, I will update more with much deeper thoughts soon (I hope), till then, blog ya later!
But yeah,
Saturday, August 13, 2005
I just saw an MTV and thought it was worth sharing coz it meant a little something to me.
It's called "Why Go" by Faithless and I can only explain what happens as best as I can with words but it goes a little something like this. It's about this girl who can't stop dancing! it starts off with her dancing in a club (nothing unusual there!) but as she leaves the club she dances through the exit (not so weird) but as she walks back home she just keeps dancing (energizer bunny has nothing against this girl!) even when she brushes her teeth, sleeps (yes sleep-dancing!) and wakes up. She does this on the streets, on the railway, on the lift at work, at work, and gets tons of dirty stares from people that say "what are you doing???" you prolly know what i'm talking about. But anyway, that doesn't stop her and she just keeps dancing to her own tune and can't care less what everybody else thinks. And throughout all this, everyone else is acting really bland and normal.
She keeps dancing (as you guessed!) on the way back from work and while going down the escalator. You suddenly see this guy going up the escalator who's dancing as wild as her, and TA-DAH their eyes meet. And then, you see them at a formal dinner dancing! and they even make love dancing (alluded to, no nudity!), and get married, and have kids that dance! Definately the most romantic Techno song I've ever seen! hehe.
But yeah, it was really funny and yet really strangely encouraging at the same time. We all have our own different music that we dance to in life, and you don't have to comply to the World, and we go through life until we meet someone else that dances to that same tune, and it doesn't have to be every girl you see. So i guess what the MTV is saying is that you shouldn't put on a show to impress girls/guys, just be who you are, there's no need to change to impress anyone else, and until you find that other person that sings your song/dances to your tune, just keep enjoying life and keep rocking! :D I think that everyone has their own song, and everyone their own beat, just find that one that matches yours! Try and see this video if you can download it, my words don't do it justice.
Think you can watch it at http://de.music.yahoo.com/musicvideos/lists/byalpha.asp?l=f&p=1
It's called "Why Go" by Faithless and I can only explain what happens as best as I can with words but it goes a little something like this. It's about this girl who can't stop dancing! it starts off with her dancing in a club (nothing unusual there!) but as she leaves the club she dances through the exit (not so weird) but as she walks back home she just keeps dancing (energizer bunny has nothing against this girl!) even when she brushes her teeth, sleeps (yes sleep-dancing!) and wakes up. She does this on the streets, on the railway, on the lift at work, at work, and gets tons of dirty stares from people that say "what are you doing???" you prolly know what i'm talking about. But anyway, that doesn't stop her and she just keeps dancing to her own tune and can't care less what everybody else thinks. And throughout all this, everyone else is acting really bland and normal.
She keeps dancing (as you guessed!) on the way back from work and while going down the escalator. You suddenly see this guy going up the escalator who's dancing as wild as her, and TA-DAH their eyes meet. And then, you see them at a formal dinner dancing! and they even make love dancing (alluded to, no nudity!), and get married, and have kids that dance! Definately the most romantic Techno song I've ever seen! hehe.
But yeah, it was really funny and yet really strangely encouraging at the same time. We all have our own different music that we dance to in life, and you don't have to comply to the World, and we go through life until we meet someone else that dances to that same tune, and it doesn't have to be every girl you see. So i guess what the MTV is saying is that you shouldn't put on a show to impress girls/guys, just be who you are, there's no need to change to impress anyone else, and until you find that other person that sings your song/dances to your tune, just keep enjoying life and keep rocking! :D I think that everyone has their own song, and everyone their own beat, just find that one that matches yours! Try and see this video if you can download it, my words don't do it justice.
Think you can watch it at http://de.music.yahoo.com/musicvideos/lists/byalpha.asp?l=f&p=1
Friday, August 05, 2005
To dare to live alone is the rarest courage; since there are many who had rather meet their bitterest enemy in the field, than their own hearts in their closet.
- Charles Caleb Colton
Pray that your loneliness may spur you into finding something to live for, great enough to die for.
- Dag Hammarskjold
The most I ever did for you was to outlive you. But that is much.
- Edna St. Vincent Millay
Theres nothing terribly wrong with feeling lost, so long as that feeling precedes some plan on your part to actually do something about it. Too often a person grows complacent with their disillusionment, perpetually wearing their "discomfort" like a favorite shirt.
- Jhonen Vasquez
There is absolutely no point in sitting around and feeling sorry for youself. The great power you have is to let go ... focus on what you have, no that which has been mean or unkindly removed.
- Minnie Driver
To transform the emptiness of loneliness, to the fullness of aloneness. Ah, that is the secret of life.
- Sunita Khosla
One may have a blazing hearth in one's soul, and yet no one ever comes to sit by it.
- Vincent van Gogh
When Christ said: "I was hungry and you fed me," he didn't mean only the hunger for bread and for food; he also meant the hunger to be loved. Jesus himself experienced this loneliness. He came amongst his own and his own received him not, and it hurt him then and it has kept on hurting him. The same hunger, the same loneliness, the same having no one to be accepted by and to be loved and wanted by. Every human being in that case resembles Christ in his loneliness; and that is the hardest part, that's real hunger.
- Mother Teresa
There are times in ones life where one must face adversity in the form of loneliness. Be wise to know that this is not forever, it is only but for a moment, a stage for you to find out what you are really made of. And maybe it can be said that there is no complete victory and that some fear of oneself will always remain, but even within the darkest moment, there is hope. I choose to face these moments and not to let them overtake me because God is my strength and my portion forever.
Create and appreciate happy lasting memories of your family, friends and special ones because in moments like these, they are all that accompany you in the darkest of hours.
When you think that all you do is worth nothing, that all your endeavours are a gust in the wind, that you have no one to live for, remember that to God you were worth everything, and you prolly mean a lot more to your friends than you think.
-Charles Ling
- Charles Caleb Colton
Pray that your loneliness may spur you into finding something to live for, great enough to die for.
- Dag Hammarskjold
The most I ever did for you was to outlive you. But that is much.
- Edna St. Vincent Millay
Theres nothing terribly wrong with feeling lost, so long as that feeling precedes some plan on your part to actually do something about it. Too often a person grows complacent with their disillusionment, perpetually wearing their "discomfort" like a favorite shirt.
- Jhonen Vasquez
There is absolutely no point in sitting around and feeling sorry for youself. The great power you have is to let go ... focus on what you have, no that which has been mean or unkindly removed.
- Minnie Driver
To transform the emptiness of loneliness, to the fullness of aloneness. Ah, that is the secret of life.
- Sunita Khosla
One may have a blazing hearth in one's soul, and yet no one ever comes to sit by it.
- Vincent van Gogh
When Christ said: "I was hungry and you fed me," he didn't mean only the hunger for bread and for food; he also meant the hunger to be loved. Jesus himself experienced this loneliness. He came amongst his own and his own received him not, and it hurt him then and it has kept on hurting him. The same hunger, the same loneliness, the same having no one to be accepted by and to be loved and wanted by. Every human being in that case resembles Christ in his loneliness; and that is the hardest part, that's real hunger.
- Mother Teresa
There are times in ones life where one must face adversity in the form of loneliness. Be wise to know that this is not forever, it is only but for a moment, a stage for you to find out what you are really made of. And maybe it can be said that there is no complete victory and that some fear of oneself will always remain, but even within the darkest moment, there is hope. I choose to face these moments and not to let them overtake me because God is my strength and my portion forever.
Create and appreciate happy lasting memories of your family, friends and special ones because in moments like these, they are all that accompany you in the darkest of hours.
When you think that all you do is worth nothing, that all your endeavours are a gust in the wind, that you have no one to live for, remember that to God you were worth everything, and you prolly mean a lot more to your friends than you think.
-Charles Ling
Thursday, August 04, 2005
Ok thought I'd pop in for a post because God deserves all the glory for saving my butt this week :D Thank you God!
Alright my cutesy little bum has been saved 3 times this week but I'll just put down the two coolest little ones down coz I need to catch some shuteye soon.
Alright scenario 1 (and it did really happen) me and my mate Daniel were coming home one morning after having a guys night out with the boys and so he was crashing at my place as per usual after such occasions. And on such occasions he would normally park in the visitors carpark right beside my apartment, but tonight he asked "Charlie (yeah he calls me that, definately not a term of endearment i can tell u that *takes some anti-homosexual mouthspray*) should I park in front of your garage? Ok normally my car would be in that spot because the Jagster would be in the garage and my car would be outside of the garage, but it was away at the mechanics for repairs (I didn't crash it, just routine repairs so take that smirk off ur face :P)! And so i agreed, but the next morning when I woke up, I found out that all the cars at the visitor carpark were broken into and had stuff stolen, and Dan's car which is only 5 meters away from there hadn't been broken into. Thank You God, You're awesome moment #1!
Thank You God, You're awesome moment #2 happened today. I lost my wallet, but managed to find it for lunch time at the place i sat in class, weird I thought, this kinda stuff doesn't normally happen to me. Turns out that there is a hole in my pocket the size of Denmark (well.. ok my pants aren't THAT big). So I lost it again, which really sucked because here i was living alone, and losing my wallet would mean I would've had to start searching telephone booths for coins for dinner :P But actually thank God just yesterday I had just gone shopping and bought enough groceries to last the next ice age, but still i was a little angry/sad/worried/sick/tired (woah that's a lotta emotions) but I remembered really quick that God had brought me through such things before. And so I prayed to God "You've done awesomer things in my life before, I'm trusting You" and went on with my day. Small miracle number 2, i usually keep my bus card in my wallet straight after i get on the bus to go to uni, but today i was feeling lazy (mayb coz i was sick) and my bus card was in my other pocket (with no hole thankfully!) and it had one last bus ride on it, so I could get home! Ok, so I reach home after university, and then I'm going to call James my friend for some money while I'm wallet-less, and lo and behold, there is a voicemail on my cell phone from James saying that my auntie has my wallet! LOL. Well my wallet has my drivers license in it which has my old address (i shld really tell them that I moved) which is 29A Winstone Road, and it turns out that my auntie through some circumstances moved to 29 Winstone Road (the house in front). So.. it turns out he was walking around 29A, and she asked him what he was doing, and he showed her my wallet!! Haha and so I went to pick it up and it's sitting here right in front of my monitor now. My trust in pockets has been severely misplaced. Pockets are overrated (especially Hole-y pockets, haha bad joke I know).
So yeah.. if that made sense, congratulations you should be a lawyer. But really really Thank You God, You're awesome! :) I know my faith in You is not misplaced and I stepped out in faith and trust You and You came through for me! Thank You for your 101 miracles and giving me my wallet back. You really do work in strange and mysterious ways! :)
Alright my cutesy little bum has been saved 3 times this week but I'll just put down the two coolest little ones down coz I need to catch some shuteye soon.
Alright scenario 1 (and it did really happen) me and my mate Daniel were coming home one morning after having a guys night out with the boys and so he was crashing at my place as per usual after such occasions. And on such occasions he would normally park in the visitors carpark right beside my apartment, but tonight he asked "Charlie (yeah he calls me that, definately not a term of endearment i can tell u that *takes some anti-homosexual mouthspray*) should I park in front of your garage? Ok normally my car would be in that spot because the Jagster would be in the garage and my car would be outside of the garage, but it was away at the mechanics for repairs (I didn't crash it, just routine repairs so take that smirk off ur face :P)! And so i agreed, but the next morning when I woke up, I found out that all the cars at the visitor carpark were broken into and had stuff stolen, and Dan's car which is only 5 meters away from there hadn't been broken into. Thank You God, You're awesome moment #1!
Thank You God, You're awesome moment #2 happened today. I lost my wallet, but managed to find it for lunch time at the place i sat in class, weird I thought, this kinda stuff doesn't normally happen to me. Turns out that there is a hole in my pocket the size of Denmark (well.. ok my pants aren't THAT big). So I lost it again, which really sucked because here i was living alone, and losing my wallet would mean I would've had to start searching telephone booths for coins for dinner :P But actually thank God just yesterday I had just gone shopping and bought enough groceries to last the next ice age, but still i was a little angry/sad/worried/sick/tired (woah that's a lotta emotions) but I remembered really quick that God had brought me through such things before. And so I prayed to God "You've done awesomer things in my life before, I'm trusting You" and went on with my day. Small miracle number 2, i usually keep my bus card in my wallet straight after i get on the bus to go to uni, but today i was feeling lazy (mayb coz i was sick) and my bus card was in my other pocket (with no hole thankfully!) and it had one last bus ride on it, so I could get home! Ok, so I reach home after university, and then I'm going to call James my friend for some money while I'm wallet-less, and lo and behold, there is a voicemail on my cell phone from James saying that my auntie has my wallet! LOL. Well my wallet has my drivers license in it which has my old address (i shld really tell them that I moved) which is 29A Winstone Road, and it turns out that my auntie through some circumstances moved to 29 Winstone Road (the house in front). So.. it turns out he was walking around 29A, and she asked him what he was doing, and he showed her my wallet!! Haha and so I went to pick it up and it's sitting here right in front of my monitor now. My trust in pockets has been severely misplaced. Pockets are overrated (especially Hole-y pockets, haha bad joke I know).
So yeah.. if that made sense, congratulations you should be a lawyer. But really really Thank You God, You're awesome! :) I know my faith in You is not misplaced and I stepped out in faith and trust You and You came through for me! Thank You for your 101 miracles and giving me my wallet back. You really do work in strange and mysterious ways! :)
Wednesday, July 20, 2005
Hm....... What should I blog today?? Well, sent the car in for repairs, which are costing me (my dad actually :P) 380 NZD!! Won't be getting it back till Friday I think so now I actually have to walk places, ugh!
Looked in the mirror today and have noticed I'm losing my tummy (in a good way, not to flesh eating bacteria)! All that exercise is slowly paying off! Yay! Although I'll dread heading back to Malaysia and ruining all that work and becoming fat again! :( But I'm not too fussed about what I look like, and the Malaysian food (Char Kueh Teaw, Satay and etc etc) is SOOO WORTH IT! :)
Ok... time for EMBARASSING AUSTRALIAN MOMENT story time :) Ooh boy I'm gonna regret typing this down I'll tell you that. Well one of the nights Hang Yuan and Co took me to this Indian place called Bizmi which does Roti Canai and stuff, and wow I pigged out sooooo badly on all the curries and biryani rices and etc (can't get good stuff like that in NZ) and.... the next day I had diarhoea! and i mean BAD diarhoea, wouldn't have been too bad if we had stayed at home, but that was the last day I was in Australia and so we decided to visit the Great Ocean Road and see the 12 apostles (only 8 left i heard! they were still twelve when i visited). And it was a longgggg (and I mean longgggg) drive. I had to make numerous pitstops, and once we were in the middle of nowhere and driving, and I had an attack.. And let's just say I gave back to the Outback for taking me in (make sense?)! Which is why I say I left a part of me in Australia (no more 'leaving pregnant girls in Oz' rumours ok??). Lol there I said it, gonna go and hide myself in shame now. Anyways, plenty more stories coming up in future updates.
Blog ya later
Tip: Do not eat massive amounts of curry the day before a big trip!
Looked in the mirror today and have noticed I'm losing my tummy (in a good way, not to flesh eating bacteria)! All that exercise is slowly paying off! Yay! Although I'll dread heading back to Malaysia and ruining all that work and becoming fat again! :( But I'm not too fussed about what I look like, and the Malaysian food (Char Kueh Teaw, Satay and etc etc) is SOOO WORTH IT! :)
Ok... time for EMBARASSING AUSTRALIAN MOMENT story time :) Ooh boy I'm gonna regret typing this down I'll tell you that. Well one of the nights Hang Yuan and Co took me to this Indian place called Bizmi which does Roti Canai and stuff, and wow I pigged out sooooo badly on all the curries and biryani rices and etc (can't get good stuff like that in NZ) and.... the next day I had diarhoea! and i mean BAD diarhoea, wouldn't have been too bad if we had stayed at home, but that was the last day I was in Australia and so we decided to visit the Great Ocean Road and see the 12 apostles (only 8 left i heard! they were still twelve when i visited). And it was a longgggg (and I mean longgggg) drive. I had to make numerous pitstops, and once we were in the middle of nowhere and driving, and I had an attack.. And let's just say I gave back to the Outback for taking me in (make sense?)! Which is why I say I left a part of me in Australia (no more 'leaving pregnant girls in Oz' rumours ok??). Lol there I said it, gonna go and hide myself in shame now. Anyways, plenty more stories coming up in future updates.
Blog ya later
Tip: Do not eat massive amounts of curry the day before a big trip!
Tuesday, July 19, 2005
Just going through some old poetry I wrote a long time ago, you can find them on www.poetry.com if you search for Charles Ling :) The first one I wrote was about the experiences of a new father arriving at the hospital after his son was born, and the other I just imagined a mum reading a bedtime poem (that's what it's called) to her child just before she sleeps. Enjoy! :) I don't know why I wrote these since I have't gone through these particular experiences, but I guess I put myself in those positions as I wrote those poems.
A Joyful Moment
I walk into this building of death;
Of gloom, sadness and hopelessness;
With leaden feet and a beating heart;
I quickly brace myself for my part.
I feel a lump in my chest;
No feeling can deny,
A joyousness no words could express;
I hear a gentle cry.
My eyes I keep tightly shut,
If not they'd flood Noah's Ark,
A baby boy lies in her hands,
I can't believe God's plans.
That God would bless such a soul;
A wretched creature, I confess;
I hear a faint gentle whisper;
Of bliss and joy and happiness.
I hold him with my hardened hands,
He's small and tiny like a toy,
He's what I feel the world needs,
To bring forth new hope, love and joy.
Charles Jun Ling
A Bedtime Poem
Tonight whilst you sleep in bed,
I'll send angels to watch over your head,
As shooting stars slowly pass you by,
I hope that in your dreams you'll fly,
To happy places, and happy times,
Meeting familiar faces of many kinds,
Of cheery hello's and great goodbyes,
I hope you'll dream of happy thoughts,
Of English fleets and Spanish ports,
And while you rest your head in bed,
Dream of St Nicholas in his sled,
Don't worry how to make the world right,
But think of happy times,
And then the world will seem bright,
As you go to bed,
Good night, sleep tight,
Tonight.
Charles Ling
A Joyful Moment
I walk into this building of death;
Of gloom, sadness and hopelessness;
With leaden feet and a beating heart;
I quickly brace myself for my part.
I feel a lump in my chest;
No feeling can deny,
A joyousness no words could express;
I hear a gentle cry.
My eyes I keep tightly shut,
If not they'd flood Noah's Ark,
A baby boy lies in her hands,
I can't believe God's plans.
That God would bless such a soul;
A wretched creature, I confess;
I hear a faint gentle whisper;
Of bliss and joy and happiness.
I hold him with my hardened hands,
He's small and tiny like a toy,
He's what I feel the world needs,
To bring forth new hope, love and joy.
Charles Jun Ling
A Bedtime Poem
Tonight whilst you sleep in bed,
I'll send angels to watch over your head,
As shooting stars slowly pass you by,
I hope that in your dreams you'll fly,
To happy places, and happy times,
Meeting familiar faces of many kinds,
Of cheery hello's and great goodbyes,
I hope you'll dream of happy thoughts,
Of English fleets and Spanish ports,
And while you rest your head in bed,
Dream of St Nicholas in his sled,
Don't worry how to make the world right,
But think of happy times,
And then the world will seem bright,
As you go to bed,
Good night, sleep tight,
Tonight.
Charles Ling
Friday, July 15, 2005
Hm.... after being called the worst blogger in the world (self admitted too!) I decided to take up the challenge of being the 2nd worst blogger in the world (by posting at least one entry) so I can dominate over someone else.
What did I do today? Woke up late for dance practice, I subconsciously (well, half-consciously) set the alarm one hour later in my drowsy state and went back to peaceful bliss. It was part honest mistake, part lazy-bum-nitis (may or may not exist), because I thought I had set the alarm one hour too early (well it felt like it was one hour too early at least!). So then I made a mad dash to Uni is an astounding 30 minutes (Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No it's a sweaty frantic [can't forget to mention late] asian!). We did some more work with the breakdance moves, but aren't close to being presentable yet.
Last night we had dinner at a place called Los Incas in Devonport, which is across the bay from Auckland. Since we weren't in the mood for a mid winter swim in Auckland harbour we drove the car over the Harbour bridge (like sane people do!). But you can also get to Devonport by ferry from Auckland for a dirty cheap $9! The food there was really good, I ordered "The Hand of God" (hm.... God for dinner) which was steak argentinian style which was totally awesome. William had the seafood stew which turned out to be awesome (I totally regreted ordering God for dinner). Oh well, you win this time Will! We went to celebrate Yen's birthday and I got him a book he wanted called Digital Fortress by Dan Brown (which I'm borrowing after his done, already reserved it! :P expect a review in 2 years time when I finish reading it).
Also went shopping for Lily's birthday today, grrr too many 21sts make my bank account cry!! Oh well, me and Angie roamed the ghetto that is Auckland (it's not really a ghetto, just sounds cool) in search of the perfect gift. We eventually got her a makeup container, and a siberian husky (toy! before you guys expect me to buy you 1000dollar dogs for your 21sts too) inside it! Awww so cute... Kawai deshou! ^_^
Anyways, it's gonna be another mad dash before uni starts, I've got a few parties to go to not to mention more dance practices (oh my aching body) plus the habit of sleeping at 4am which won't be good when uni starts. Ooooh boy I haven't studied for Law at all, and i've had six weeks to start, I'll start tomorrow... (Yeah right!)
That's it for now, blog ya later! :)
What did I do today? Woke up late for dance practice, I subconsciously (well, half-consciously) set the alarm one hour later in my drowsy state and went back to peaceful bliss. It was part honest mistake, part lazy-bum-nitis (may or may not exist), because I thought I had set the alarm one hour too early (well it felt like it was one hour too early at least!). So then I made a mad dash to Uni is an astounding 30 minutes (Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No it's a sweaty frantic [can't forget to mention late] asian!). We did some more work with the breakdance moves, but aren't close to being presentable yet.
Last night we had dinner at a place called Los Incas in Devonport, which is across the bay from Auckland. Since we weren't in the mood for a mid winter swim in Auckland harbour we drove the car over the Harbour bridge (like sane people do!). But you can also get to Devonport by ferry from Auckland for a dirty cheap $9! The food there was really good, I ordered "The Hand of God" (hm.... God for dinner) which was steak argentinian style which was totally awesome. William had the seafood stew which turned out to be awesome (I totally regreted ordering God for dinner). Oh well, you win this time Will! We went to celebrate Yen's birthday and I got him a book he wanted called Digital Fortress by Dan Brown (which I'm borrowing after his done, already reserved it! :P expect a review in 2 years time when I finish reading it).
Also went shopping for Lily's birthday today, grrr too many 21sts make my bank account cry!! Oh well, me and Angie roamed the ghetto that is Auckland (it's not really a ghetto, just sounds cool) in search of the perfect gift. We eventually got her a makeup container, and a siberian husky (toy! before you guys expect me to buy you 1000dollar dogs for your 21sts too) inside it! Awww so cute... Kawai deshou! ^_^
Anyways, it's gonna be another mad dash before uni starts, I've got a few parties to go to not to mention more dance practices (oh my aching body) plus the habit of sleeping at 4am which won't be good when uni starts. Ooooh boy I haven't studied for Law at all, and i've had six weeks to start, I'll start tomorrow... (Yeah right!)
That's it for now, blog ya later! :)
Friday, July 01, 2005
It's been awhile since I last blogged anything remotely connected to my life but expect a big update soon! :) I'm still in Melbourne, and the week has passed by, not too quickly, but has left me with many new friends, strengthened existing ones, and most of all given me many great memories :) And I guess that's what a large part of life is about, creating great memories, and Melbourne is a great place (not as great as Auckland tho :P) and IMacs (what I'm using now) aren't as great as PC's :P
It hasn't been all about me taking from Australia, I left a little bit of myself there too (Hang Yuan and Juni know this :P) I might tell everyone else later, but I might not, we'll see how things go! But Hang Yuan and Juni, thanks for opening up your houses to me during this week, I'm blessed to have great friends like you and am happy to have shared this week with you guys, I'm just waiting for you guys to come to Auckland so I can repay the favour :)
Well, it's 1AM now and my flight is at 8.15am, so.... Farewell Melbourne, thank you for the memories, great to have met so many new people, and I guess I might see you again someday :) Peace out from down under (which is actually above NZ, but watever)
It hasn't been all about me taking from Australia, I left a little bit of myself there too (Hang Yuan and Juni know this :P) I might tell everyone else later, but I might not, we'll see how things go! But Hang Yuan and Juni, thanks for opening up your houses to me during this week, I'm blessed to have great friends like you and am happy to have shared this week with you guys, I'm just waiting for you guys to come to Auckland so I can repay the favour :)
Well, it's 1AM now and my flight is at 8.15am, so.... Farewell Melbourne, thank you for the memories, great to have met so many new people, and I guess I might see you again someday :) Peace out from down under (which is actually above NZ, but watever)
Tuesday, June 21, 2005
Monday, June 20, 2005
Your element is Light: Innocent, beautiful, kind-
hearted and pure. You are so sweet your almost
angelic, you find joy in others happiness and
cannot stand to see anyone in pain. You want to
make everyone around you feel good about
themselves and if someone is upset you can tend
to become rather upset as well which means you
are sympathetic and raise others above
yourself. Being as kind and good-natured as you
are people have most likely hurt you in the
past but you pick yourself up every time. You
may look fragile but you are stronger than most
tend to see. Life is beautiful no matter how
you look at it and you understand that people
make mistakes, not everyone is perfect. You try
to see the good in the bad which is a talent
few posses, dont ever let anyone change you.
You truly have a beautiful soul inside and a
heart of gold.
.:-|What is your true element?|-:. -With Anime Pictures and detailed answers-
brought to you by Quizilla
Friday, June 17, 2005
Part Romantic Kisser |
For you, kissing is all about feeling the romance You love to kiss under the stars or by the sea The perfect kiss involves the perfect mood It's pretty common for kisses to sweep you off your feet |
Part Expert Kisser |
You're a kissing pro, but it's all about quality and not quantity You've perfected your kissing technique and can knock anyone's socks off And you're adaptable, giving each partner what they crave When it comes down to it, your kisses are truly unforgettable |
You Are Not Scary |
Everyone loves you. Isn't that sweet? |
You Are a Prophet Soul |
You are a gentle soul, with good intentions toward everyone. Selfless and kind, you have great faith in people. Sometimes this faith can lead to disappoinment in the long run. No matter what, you deal with everything in a calm and balanced way. You are a good interpreter, very sensitive, intuitive, caring, and gentle. Concerned about the world, you are good at predicting people's feelings. A seeker of wisdom, you are a life long learner looking for purpose and meaning. You are a great thinker and communicator, but not necessarily a doer. Souls you are most compatible with: Bright Star Soul and Dreaming Soul |
Thursday, May 26, 2005
YES!!! Woohoo this made my day (so far my day has consisted of reading a big red book that is labelled "Tort") and I swear I got this on my first attempt! So if I sound like the guy for you just email me babe!! ;)
Your Seduction Style: Ideal Lover |
You seduce people by tapping into their dreams and desires. And because of this sensitivity, you can be the ideal lover for anyone you seek. You are a shapeshifter - bringing romance, adventure, spirituality to relationships. It all depends on who your with, and what their vision of a perfect relationship is. |
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