Excerpt from "Emma"
I wondered if you would find this letter
To leave you in such a manner is my one regret
And yet.. my heart at this moment is somehow strangely filled with calmness and peacefulness
Even knowing it was a love that could not come true for us...
To be able to reach out to you like this..
I was truly happy
The precious memory of you will always be with me
Though we will live apart
I wish you happiness for all time.

I hate sad endings. :(

Emma is the tragic tale of a romance that blossomed but was always doomed to failure.
It main theme is about the difference between different classes - the gentry and the lower class - that was prevalent in the Victorian Era and which still exists even in some socieities today and the exposes the unjust consequences of such a aristocracical system.
Sometimes we have to make the hardest decisions now for the best future.
How will we ever know whether that hardest decision was the right one?
Can love conquer all? Can it truly bridge the gap between two worlds?
Don't be stupid and decide to be a hero and take the fall for me, we're in this together, love is all there is. True love is a once-in-a-lifetime thing.
As long as there is hope, the human spirit lives on.

Genuine Wealth

One day, the father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to the country with the express purpose of showing him how poor people live. They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would be considered a very poor family. On their return from their trip, the father asked his son, "How was the trip?"

"It was great, Dad."

"Did you see how poor people live?" the father asked.

"Oh yeah," said the son.

"So, tell me, what did you learn from the trip?" asked the father.

The son answered:

"I saw that we have one dog and they had four.

We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our garden and they have a creek that has no end.

We have imported lanterns in our garden and they have the stars at night.

Our patio reaches to the front yard and they have the whole horizon.

We have a small piece of land to live on and they have fields that go beyond our sight.

We have servants who serve us, but they serve others.

We buy our food, but they grow theirs.

We have walls around our property to protect us, they have friends to protect them."

The boy's father was speechless.

Then his son added, "Thanks Dad for showing me how poor we are."

Isn't perspective a wonderful thing? Makes you wonder what would happen if we all gave thanks for everything we have, instead of worrying about what we don't have.

Appreciate every single thing you have, especially your friends!

"Life is too short and friends are too few."

Don't worry, I've not gone weird or gotten married nor am I pregnant. The past few posts are just things that I wrote after my last relationship (which was a longggggggggg time ago). I always thought I'd use them for a song or two, but seems like they'll stay just words for now. Which is fine by me.

Heh. Some of those seem funny now that I read them again.

The hopeless romantic never dies.

Well that's that,
You've said what you needed to say,
And now we stand as separate,
No longer taking a secret joy in that connection that is now 1severed.
And I can only regret the things
I did to make you do what you did.

I should've given you more attention,
I should've been more sympathetic,
I should've been there for you.
But now these things I want to be have changed from 'should've' to 'never will',
Because I'll never get the chance again
Because time cannot turn back the hands of time and I'm left here,
Feeling so sorry for the way I'd treated you,
You didn't deserve it,
It was all me, my life my lies and my ego,

What use is pride when you end up alone with an empty house for a heart.
The warmth I dreamt of was always only a teasing whisper in the breeze.
And my heart continues to reach out for it, grasping the nothingness of an empty illusion.

We often see our mistakes only after we've done them,

We only miss people after they've moved on,

We'll only ever know what we had, once it's gone.

It's a sunny sunday outside
but inside my heart
just the little things in life
tear me apart
and i'm feeling pressed down
a little bent
like i'm getting worn away
i can't be strong forever
in fact i'm weak as hell today

woh-oh-oh i, i know i'm living a blue monday
the wrong day of the week for my life
just another blue monday
i wish dawn was here but it's never gonna reach
the reds and yellows all turn to grey

i'm feeling lazy
even a little crazy
wondering meanings of nothings
everything's hazy
too many things daze me

looking for this light at the end that's supposed to be in view
but finding nothing more than a wall that calls itself a seal
waiting for the day this crooked will not bend
waiting for the moment this all will end

and even if these wings weren't meant to fly
i'll still gonna spread them wide, i was born to try
for nothing worth something ever came for free
and maybe one day this could just be too easy

Restless dreams
by the candlelight
illuminate all of my fears inside
the northern wind
sends chills down my spine (it gives me chils)
as i try to keep this
dying flame alive
this dying flame alive

So darling can't you see
Nothing ever comes for free
sometimes you give less than you take
You know your fragile heart I'll never break

I've given up my dreams just to hold you
Gone and lost my way just to find you
Did nothing ever reach your heart
I did it all for you
Gave it all I had
Don't regret it now
You did this to yourself

is it asking too much
is it asking at all
Oh was I a fool to hope your forever meant forever

Wake up now and smell the roses
And throw the memories of yesterday away
Today's a brand new day and it's time to find a new horizon
It's time for you to put on those new shiny shoes
And let everyone know that you're not here to lose
You gotta give it all your best now
You're gonna make yourself damn proud

Though everyone's waiting for you to fall
I'll be there when you call

Wake up early in the morning
Sunlight's yet to greet the sky
Still the same old story same old life
Bills to pay and things to buy
Chances wasted
Another day's gone
You try your best
but you never belong

And everything's not as it seems
The waves are crashing down on you
The world is spinning round and round
And you're swimming hard trying not to drown
The walls are closing in You can't escape
It's way too late
Take my hand, I'll hold it tight
I'll save you tonight

2006 was sooooooooooooo last year!

I'm back~ Blogger was giving me some problems but it's all good now, hope u're ready for a new year of lame jokes, contradictory contradictions, oh, and don't forget the seasonal "i feel so lonely.. why does nobody love me" posts.

Happy Chinese New Year, hope all you pigs have a great year ahead (may sound rude but it's not).

Blog ya later, expect so much more :)